give yourself a break!

i don’t feel like doing anything.  the past week or so i’ve been suffering from a major lack of motivation.  my energy is waning, and i feel like i’m pushing myself to just get the bare minimum done, let alone all the other countless things that i could be working on.  my tendency when emotions like this crop up is to “power-through” to the best of my ability.  and when i inevitably crash, i beat myself up for not doing more…

credit {here}

instead of surrendering to and accepting the feeling, i continue to bump up against it and fight it.  pushing it away, only to have it bombard me again moments later.  that, in and of itself, is exhausting.  i must admit, i’m not new to this cycle of events – when i was younger and dissatisfied with the size and shape of my body, i would diet and force my body into a battle against itself.  instead of trying to work with my hunger, i fought it.  and fighting, especially when it’s with yourself, takes you in circles.

my mom says “if you want to keep on gettin’ what your gettin’, keep on doin’ what you’re doin’” – i.e. if i want this lack-of-motivation spell to end, i have to change the way in which i’m dealing with it.  easier said than done…

but let’s give it a go, anyway.  so, with that thought in mind, what could i do differently to change my current reality?  well, instead of pushing myself to my limits, i could honor the fact that i might need a break, and…take a break!  (a novel concept, i know.)  or, instead of continually thinking, “what’s wrong with me?  why don’t i want to do anything?  why do i feel like things are at a standstill?”, i could work to silence that inner critic with a deep breathing and mindfulness.  and perhaps, in the quiet, motivation or a new idea or peace of mind could creep in.  and honestly, just writing this post is making me feel better, so i guess just writing about it – and sharing my feelings with others – is helpful, too.

as a culture, we’ve been taught to fight against unpleasant emotion, because we are a nation of doers not experiencers.  instead of surrendering to the feeling, and letting it wash over us like a wave that will eventually ebb, we prepare for battle, thinking if we set up enough barricades we can stop the wave in its tracks…which never happens.   what if, instead of always doing more we felt more.  and instead of judging our emotions and feelings, we got curious about them and tried to look at them in a more objective way.  perhaps, we would discover that they are not something to be fought, but rather a lesson waiting to be embraced. 

i feel better already….

meditation prompt for your journal or cushion:

what emotion do you continually fight?
what would it be like to just sit with it, without pushing it away?

Silver Lining

Ever have one of those days when you're feeling a little overwhelmed?  When everything seems to be hitting all at once and there don't seem to be enough hours in the day?  Well today was one of those days.  I was out of town over the weekend and came back to quite a bit of work, and (I must admit) I was allowing it to get the best of me.  I kept trudging forward, but my energy and enthusiasm were waining.  I was making cold calls for my business and wasn't making tremendous headway (or so it felt).

Yet, when these moments come, they are undoubtedly followed by something positive.  It never fails.  Just when all seems to be weighing on you, stopping you in your tracks, something comes through - no matter how small - that makes you feel better, pushes you further in the right direction or brings a smile to your face.  My last call today came through.  I found myself on the phone with someone who was genuinely pleased I had reached out to them.  They needed my assistance and I needed theirs.  Kismet.

Just as I was feeling downtrodden, I was handed my silver lining because I kept moving forward.  I didn't let my doubts get the best of me.  And because of that, I was given a chance to make something happen.  A chance to move forward in a positive direction that will better myself and my business.  Funny how one small positive thing can make everything come into perspective in a new, uplifting, empowering way.

Keep on keepin' on.  It'll pay off...I promise.

Maintain Your Motivation

Isn't it great when you first set a goal for yourself?  You're so pumped and ready to go and just know that you're going to succeed.  Nothing can stop you!  Fast-forward one week.  Still feel the same way?  If you're like most people, probably not.  After the first few "honeymoon" days, reality begins to set in.  You start to questions yourself and your resolve.  So, how do you power through when your motivation is fading fast?  Below are some simple, easy tricks to harness your motivation to reach all your healthy lifestyle goals!

1. Change your vocabulary. Saying "I want to workout" or "I choose to eat healthy foods" is much more empowering that victimizing yourself and saying "I have to..."

2. Make a list. Making a list of all the reasons why your healthy living goals are important is a great way to harness your motivation. List everything from "fitting into my 'skinny' jeans" to "being able to play with my kids". Reread the list whenever you need a motivation booster.

3. Share your goals. Sharing your goals with others is a great way to hold yourself accountable. Telling your family and friends what you're hoping to achieve is a wonderful way to motivate yourself because if you fail to reach your goals, you'll not only disappoint yourself, but you'll have to "explain" it to your friends and family.

4. Recruit a friend. So many of us aim to get healthier as one of our primary goals. So, why not reach out to a friend, sibling or spouse to accompany you on your journey. Teaming up is a fantastic way to get your butt in gear!

Best of luck : )

Harness Your Motivation!

Below are some simple, easy tricks to harness your motivation to reach all your healthy lifestyle goals!

1. Change your vocabulary. Saying "I want to workout" or "I choose to eat healthy foods" is much more empowering that victimizing yourself and saying "I have to..."

2. Make a list. Making a list of all the reasons why your healthy living goals are important is a great way to harness your motivation. List everything from "fitting into my 'skinny' jeans" to "being able to play with my kids". Reread the list whenever you need a motivation booster.

3. Share your goals. Sharing your goals with others is a great way to hold yourself accountable. Telling your family and friends what you're hoping to achieve is a wonderful way to motivate yourself because if you fail to reach your goals, you'll not only disappoint yourself, but you'll have to "explain" it to your friends and family.

4. Recruit a friend. So many of us aim to get healthier as one of our primary goals. So, why not reach out to a friend, sibling or spouse to accompany you on your journey. Teaming up is a fantastic way to get your butt in gear!

Best of luck : )

Family Boot Camp

This summer I've created a "Family Boot Camp" to help my family stay motivated as they embark on a journey toward healthier lifestyles. My aunts, cousins, parents and sister are all on board! We've created a shutterfly website (http://www.familybootcamp.shutterfly.com/) so that we can help one another stay on track.

We have weekly workouts, a healthy lunch date every other week to discuss our progress, and send emails and update the website daily to keep us all moving towards our goals. So far everyone seems to really be enjoying having a network to reach out to when they're in need of some motivation and inspiration.

Having a workout partner (or several for that matter) is a great way to keep you focused. You may not mind skipping out on exercise when you only have to justify it to yourself, but having to explain it to others is sometimes a different story. Letting family and friends know your goals holds you accountable. So, don't be afraid to share your goals and progress - it'll really help to keep you focused and on track!

For more information about Cailen Ascher Design or my upcoming book, Well-Designed Living, visit www.CailenAscher.bravehost.com or email CailenAscher@gmail.com.

Staying Motivated

Since it's over a week into 2009, I figured it was the perfect time to discuss motivation. I imagine many of you began your resolutions at the turn of the new year, and since it's already been 10 days, you may have started to feel less enthusiastic about the promises you made to yourself (and others) a week and a half ago. Since your motivation might be waning, and it's been proven to take about 30 days to successfully form a new habit, it's key that you stick to your resolutions for the next few weeks if you want them to be smoothly incorporated into your lifestyle.

Before you began your resolutions you probably thought about them intently and got yourself all geared up and ready to start. What many of us fail to do is actively work on our enthusiasm for our resolutions much beyond January 1st. We psych ourselves up for them and then neglect to continue to foster that energy and commitment that we felt early on (or even before beginning). Below are some tips and techniques for maintaining your motivation so that when you look back over this year, you can feel that you truly did your best to reach your goals!

1. Start Slowly. Even though you may have been gunning to start, it's important to make manageable changes. If you set your goal to work out 30 minutes, 5 days a week and are finding that difficult to stick to, rewind and take baby steps. Start with just 5 minutes, 5 days a week. You'll get used to setting aside the time, and you can gradually build to your goal, instead of giving up 2 weeks in.

2. Put it on Paper. If you haven't already done so, write your resolutions down. Sometimes the simple act of transferring your thoughts onto paper makes you feel more driven. List the reasons why you chose to make each resolution. When you're feeling like giving up, reread what you wrote and remind yourself of why you wanted to make these changes in the first place.

3. Recruit Support. If you feel accountable to someone else, you're more likely to stick to your goals. Share your resolutions with a loved one and even ask them to "check up" on you each day, week, month, etc. It's one thing to let yourself down, but it's another when you feel like you'll disappoint somebody else with your (lack of) actions.

4. Keep Track. Record your progress. Journaling about the headway you're making with regard to your resolutions will reaffirm why you made them in the first place. Also, when you're feeling frustrated, you can look back and see how far you've come!

Best of luck with your resolutions! Let me know how you're doing so far.

For more information about Cailen Ascher Design or my upcoming book, Well-Designed Living, visit www.CailenAscher.bravehost.com or email CailenAscher@gmail.com.