Monday, October 3, 2011

om monday: bite your tongue

one thing i've learned...and continue to that "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."  i'm embarrassed to say that i fall into the trap too often.  i say something, and the second it leaves my lips, i wish i hadn't put it out there.  it's not even necessarily the words i'm using but the tone.  cold.  or frustrated.  or annoyed.  and i know the other person hears it, feels it and internalizes it.

yet, despite this realization, and even despite the fact that i don't like this trait very much, i find it very, very, very difficult sometimes to suppress the urge to let it out.  even though i know it's followed almost instantaneously by regret.

credit {here}
what is it about us that makes us think we'll feel better by being unkind or unfriendly or not part of the solution?  i guess a lot has to do with our egos and the need to feel superior on some level - the whole "i'm right.  you're wrong," thing. 

but i know in those moments that i catch myself and don't let the unkind words slip, i feel stronger, better and more compassionate.  and that's truly the direction i would like to be moving in more. 

so i encourage you all - along with me - to set the intent to bite your tongue, even just once, in an instance when you would normally say something you may regret.  keep your lips sealed and see how you feel. 


  1. A good reminder. Happy Monday to you.

  2. great reminder. I can let out my thoughts too much at times as well!

  3. you are a very, very wise woman! something i constantly am working on and it can make all the difference.

  4. Wonderful post Cailen. I need to remember this myself because I totally fall into the category of thinking it will make me somehow feel better if I respond to someone's mean comment in an equally negative way. I always try to stop and remind myself that I have no idea what that person may be going through in life.

  5. I love this so much. I met a new friend this week who lives by this and what a treasure she is to have around. I strive to be this way and hope to get better and better. :-)

  6. I am very sarcastic and sometimes my mouth moves faster than my brain :/ Nice reminder (:

  7. i often think we should all have to read
    All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten by Robert Fulghum.

  8. This is great! My boyfriend just called me on this last week saying just because one person was being mean to me, didn't make it okay to be mean back. What a powerful quote by Plato!


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